Honorifics and Korean Politeness Levels

Korean has several levels of speech, each appropriate for different politeness level for social contexts and relationships.

These levels range from highly formal to casual. Using the correct level of speech (such as formal, polite, and intimate) based on the relationship with the listener is vital.

In the previous lessons, you already got a grasp of the speech level differences. For example, "-요" (yo) at the end of a word or sentence is a basic, default polite ending.

This level of speech is called 존댓말.

Words ending with -ㅂ니다 or 습니다 indicate a formal, higher level of speech called 높임말. It is the most respectful way to address someone in Korean.

Finally, dropping the "요" particle from a words indicate a familiar and (very) friendly form of speech called 반말.

Also in 반말 indicating something with 이에요 becomes “야” .

• 제이크입니다
  I'm Jake (formal)
• 제이크이에요
  I'm Jake (polite)
• 제이크이야
  I'm Jake (familiar)

• 감사합니다
  Thank you (formal)
• 고마워요
  Thank you (polite)
• 고마워
  Thank you (familiar)

Here, 감사합니다 is an exception, since it's also used in a very general way, but you get the point.

There are other grammatical ways to recognize those speech levels, but for now understanding those differences in phonetics is sufficient.

Use of Titles and Honorific Suffixes

In a polite context it’s common to use titles or job positions instead of names. Additionally, the honorific suffix "-님" (nim) is often added to names or titles to show respect, as in "선생님" (meaning "teacher").

You can encounter many other examples in daily life, ranging from professional context such as 실장님 to call the “head of your team”.

Or simply even you’re being called 고객님 (customer님) when entering a restaurant.

Is is also possible that people just call you by your name and add a 님 at the end.

The less polite version 씨 is appropriate to call someone you’re not friendly with yet.

Someone presenting you a friend then you can call that person 민정씨.

In 반말, 아 is used for names ending with a consonant (수빈아) and 야 for names ending with a vowel (애수야).

• 민수님 어디에 있어요?
  Minsoo-nim where are you ?
• 민수씨 어디에 있어요?
  Minsoo-ssi where are you ?
• 민수야 어디야?
  Minsoo where are you ?

Body Language and Gestures

Bowing is a sort of common gesture of respect in Korea, symbolizing respect, gratitude, and apology.

In contemporary Korean society, the practice of bowing has evolved with modern attitudes.

While the deep, formal bows are less common in everyday life, understanding the cultural significance and appropriate execution of bowing can greatly enhance social interactions in Korea.

In Korean culture, giving and receiving something is done with both hands as a sign of respect.

Refusing a gift outright can be considered rude.

Age and Social Hierarchy

Age plays a significant role in determining the level of politeness required.

Generally, one should use more formal and respectful language with those who are older or in a higher social or professional position.

When addressing elders or superiors, it's customary to use formal language (높임말) and avoid using personal names unless given permission.

Instead, use their title or position.

This rule also apply to people who are even only 1 year older than you, sometimes even 1 month.

Dining Etiquette

There are specific rules around eating, such as waiting for the eldest to start eating.

It is also common to say 잘 먹겠습니다 before eating a meal which is an equivalent of "bon appétit; enjoy your meal”.

After a meal, some people might also say 잘 먹었습니다 when the meal is finished before leaving, which means "I ate well".

You will also hear often about the whole drinking etiquette: a specific way to hold a glass, pour a drink, and even drink it “politely” with people you’re not familiar with, or again older/higher position.

Here's a quick guide on how it goes:

1. 1. Pouring drinks: It's customary for the youngest or the person with the lowest social status to pour drinks for others, especially for elders or superiors. Pouring with both hands is seen as a sign of respect.
2. 2. Receiving drinks: When someone pours you a drink, receive it with both hands as a sign of respect. If you are older or of higher status, you may receive it with one hand while placing the other hand on your chest or under your pouring arm.
3. 3. Waiting to Drink: It's polite to wait for everyone to have their drink poured and for a toast to be made before drinking. The oldest or highest-ranking person usually initiates the toast.
4. 4. Turning Away to Drink: If you are drinking with someone significantly older or of higher status, it’s respectful to turn your head away slightly when taking a sip.
5. 5. Refilling Glasses: Keep an eye on others' glasses. It is polite to offer refills when someone's glass is empty. However, you should never refill your own glass; someone else will typically do it for you.
6. 6. Handling the Bottle: When pouring, use both hands to hold the bottle, especially if the person you are pouring for is older or of higher status.